Though I’d tried to keep my expectations low (at least in writing) in the last year, I actually expected a lot during that year. As a matter of fact, I told my close friend during the last Chinese New Year (CNY) that 2015 would be a defining year for me. I thought I’d learned enough in 2014 and 2015 was the year for me to get results.
That high expectation didn’t come unreasonably as what had happened many times in the past. It did come with a “carefully crafted” plan which was well in action as early as mid December 2014.
One of my major goals last year was to get an Aussie PR. After going through all their procedures, advice & checklist, my first thought was to take the IELTS, get a good score, and therefore, satisfy their 60-point requirement.
However, things didn’t happen as easy & straightforward as I would expect. It seems I was too excited to take actions (in an attempt to avoid procrastination) that I didn’t plan well enough. I either omit or underestimate too many “trivial” which turned out to be the nitty gritty. This is the first time I experience a planning issue. It’s often said that most people fail because they didn’t take (enough) actions Or they’re not determined enough to follow through their plans. But it was not the case here.
If you fail to plan (properly), you’re planning to fail!” – Benjamin Franklin
I learn that lesson the hard way. In such a crucial year, the first `domino` fells early was apparently not a good sign…
Anyway this is a summary of my 2015.
What I’ve achieved in 2015
I complete 5km in 23:17′.
What a life milestone! I learn the “Hunger & Desire” lesson though as I quickly stop running after achieving my goal.
Massive Traveling
2015 was a massive year for me when it comes to traveling. I’ve been to Angkor Wat & Great Wall of China – one of 7 wonders of the World during my 4 trips to 6 different cities – 5 of them I had never been to. And I finally step out of the SEA to visit China – the second communist country that I visited this year after Laos. A lot of things to learn & ponder!
Seminars & Learning
This year I joined around 6 seminars & workshops including the NAC, Tony Robbins Business Mastery and the S$2,000 plus III. I’ve learned a lot (though applied little) & had chances to meet (& make friends with) many like-minded & successful people, for which I’m deeply grateful!
A Short Love
I fell in `love` again albeit a very short one. It didn’t go anywhere either. I knew it. It was more like a game. I have to admit though sometimes – sometimes only, it felt like a real & awkard high school love. The feeling of losing yourself in love is fantastic.
Trump Story & My Team
What I’ve learned in 2015
Communication is a Huge Problem for Many
I didn’t notice that brutal truth as I myself was an awful communicator. I was surprised if not shocked to find out that most people – no matter who they are, what they’re doing, which positions they’re in, are pretty bad at communication. I notice it through my (old) friends – who I thought were mature & could communicate well, my colleagues and even my boss (& many more). They would all like to back bite, gossip, argue, criticize publicly, talk more than listen, rarely care about others… Gosh!
What left after a conversation with them is usually bullshit as they’d talk about trivia (news, movie, etc.) & nonsense Or emptiness as they’d either make hurtful comments or don’t give a fuck about the person they talk to but themselves.
Skilled communicators will have a huge advantage!!! 😉
How to Judge a Person
First, I don’t think I should judge anyone but myself. But if I have to (for business or recruitment reasons), I would first invite her for a one-on-one conversation. I believe there is no better way to know a person by talking directly to them (not via phone or messages nor through conversations in a group). I realize though there are people who could behave & communicate pretty well in a group, it’s doesn’t necessarily reflect who they really are; what their thoughts and personality is. In fact, they would behave & talk very differently in a group vs one-on-one as sort of fit-in the environment.
Second, I will try to find and read her (personal) blog (not Facebook or other social sites). I believe writing (especially those written not for the public) shows a lot of one’s characters & thinking. People could act (behave & talk) diplomatically to be friendly and pleasant in person but rarely be able to hide their thoughts in writing.
Again there are exceptions though. I’ve met a few people who write very thoughtful writing & comments but turn out to be a childish twenty-something boy in person. Having said that, when combining one-on-one communication & reading their blog, it rarely that I could mis-judge a person!
Every Cloud has a Silver Lining
The news of my Uncle getting cancer came as a real shock to me just a few weeks before my 23 birthday (in 2014). Though he was not personally close to me as he was to my mom, I pretty much admire him for what he has done as a principal of the most reputable secondary school in my hometown for more than 10 years.
I went around asking my friends if they knew anyone who could possibly cure or delay the cancer development… It turned out not as bad & fast as I thought and that he’d still be OK for … a while. My mom said hopefully he could survive this year (and he did until after the last CNY). I totally didn’t expect that I could lose an uncle or aunt and I could never imagine it was him as he was relatively young (at least much younger than many of his sisters) and seemed still very healthy. In fact, he just asked me to drink a glass of beer just 2 months ago when I went back home…
In such chaos (a few weeks later I found out my first love also got engaged), I went to read more about “Birth & Death” & try to find a definite answer to questions like “is there a life after death?“. In the midst of searching, I accidentally and fortunately came to know Thich Nhat Hanh – a Vietnamese Zen Master. I listened to some of his videos on Youtube and somehow got addicted. His calmness and gentleness clearly showed in his voice and eyes totally attract me. As I told my good friend, he is only the 3rd Vietnamese person who makes me spend hours watching his videos (I become kinda less patient towards long videos as I rarely finish a 90-min movie unless it’s really good). To dates, I’ve finished watching almost all his videos available on Youtube both in English and Vietnamese. Without doubt, I become a better person than I was before getting to know him. I’m now much more patient, calm and gentle than before.
During his funeral, I also gotta a chance to catch up with an old secondary friend of mine who would become my travel buddy for my next 2 amazing trips to Laos, Cambodia & China.
There is always a positive side on every sad & difficult situation!
Find vs Change
Soon after talking & planning with her about our first trip, I realize it’s much easier to talk to someone who shares the same interests and hobbies than to convince or change someone who doesn’t (especially my existing friends). Everything was so easy & straightforward. There is absolutely no need to persuade or convince anyone anything. I still remember how difficult & time consuming it was to convince a few friends of mine to travel to Brazil to watch the World Cup 2014. I tried hard but ultimately failed. If I could invite someone like her instead, I think they would probably accept it quickly.
- As a leader, sometimes I have to be tough, decisive – though sometimes it makes me look like a `dictator`. Don’t care about that `thought` (what others think of me). Let results explain – I don’t need to explain everything < They don’t even care #Chloe #Po. I can’t please everyone anyway!!